Silliness

I know I haven't been on in a while...writer's block I guess...just can't think of anything meaningful to say! So I sit here tonight trying to gather my thoughts in order to post a new entry. Tell me if this ever happens to you...dead silence in the house, no tv, no radio, nothing. Just the clicking of the keys on the keyboard as I type. No distractions anywhere...except for in my head that is! I'm sitting here totally relaxed, but I can't seem to find a clear thought about anything. I sit quietly, not even typing...thinking maybe if I don't move my mind will lock in on one clear thought. Well it locked in alright...don't laugh...my brain locked in on the humming sound of the music from "Jeopardy"...still doing it now...I can hear it even with no sound in my house...nee,nee, nee, nee, nee, nee, nee... nee nee nee nee ne ne ne ne ne ne...nee, nee, nee, nee, nee, nee, nee, ne, ne,ne,ne,ne, ne, ne! WOW! I think I'm actually crazy! The only thing my brain will clearly focus in on right now is that Jeopardy tune...so hilarious! and I haven't even watched Jeopardy in years...I mean literally YEARS! I remember I used to hum that tune to Miranda when she was a baby as I rocked her to sleep...but she's turning 19 in just about 4 months! Guess my brain is telling me it needs a time out. It's so funny what our brains will do sometimes. Just thought I'd share this with whomever chooses to read my blog so you can laugh with me. After all, we handle life so much easier when we can learn to laugh at ourselves! When we take ourselves too seriously, it just causes too much stress on the body! So, laugh with me...Let it all out with a great big belly full of laughter!!! Enjoy!

Be Not Afraid!

I read a special message this morning about Christian College Students who were afraid to admit to their professor, an outspoken atheist, that they believed in Jesus for fear of his reaction or of the grade they might receive in his class if they admitted to knowing Jesus as their Lord and Savior. I posted it to my Facebook and wrote exactly what I felt in my heart as I read the message of the students. I wrote above the post: "I don't worry about the rooster crowing...I am NOT afraid!" Then this evening I was listening to the radio and a song came on that I've not heard before. I don't know who the artist is, or the name of the song...but the words clung to my heart, and I felt a bit convicted. The words of the song were basically saying that so many Christians, given a perfect opportunity to share their faith or speak up for God, withered or shrunk back and did not seize the moment. Sadly, instead they 'denied God'...not verbally, but by allowing their fear of what the world would think of them, they froze and could not (or would not) admit to the world that they know God...they denied Him. Listening to the words of that song, I realized the fear I feel and how I want to shrink back and hide when I realize I've drawn attention to myself and people are looking at me. Well, this made me think honestly about a situation I might be in where I could stand up for God, or share my faith and I felt conviction come over me. Let's be honest, as much as I know I want to be strong enough to speak up, I'm not sure I wouldn't shrink back and try be become invisible. It's not easy to admit this. I want to be confident that when it comes to standing up for God I would have no fear to stand up against 100 people, or 50 people, or even 20 people. One, two or even 5 people..., I'm pretty confident I wouldn't be afraid, but in a whole classroom full or a crowd of people...well, I can only pray God would give me the strength to NOT deny Him. It's easy to say, 'Oh no, I would never deny You Lord!', just as Peter said to Jesus....but thrown into an actual real-life situation with a bunch of people around who are saying they do not believe there is a God...would you 'be not afraid' to stand up and say, I KNOW there is ONE TRUE GOD, and I KNOW Jesus is my Savior? I can only pray God will give me the strength to stand up before many and proclaim Him my Lord and Savior! I know it in my heart, and have no doubt at all about the Lord, but would I 'be not afraid' to tell it to the world?

Empty Nest

So here I sit. I've just hugged my daughter goodbye as she is heading off on her very first beach vacation with just her friends...no adults. Pardon me, my daughter very quickly reminded me that SHE is and adult and so are all of her friends that are going since each one of them is at least 18 years old. I said, "you know what I mean!" and she snapped back, "Momma, I'm a big girl, I can do it myself!". Man, does that bring back memories! She has always been so independent. I remember when she was only 2 years old and pulling all of her clothes out of her dresser drawers trying to decide what she wanted to wear. Then I'd try to help her dress...she was only 2 you know!...but she would get very upset with me and say, "Momma, I'm a big girl, I can do it myself!" Only in not so clear words. It was actually more like: 'Momma, I a bid dirl, I tan do it myseff!' But, you get my point anyway, right? Wow, how time flies! Part of me is so very proud, but the other part of me just wants to sit down and boohoo for days! She still lives at home, so its not like 'empty nest syndrome' yet, but then again it still is. I think 'empty nest syndrome' is not just the empty house, or emptiness you feel when one of your children grows up and leaves. I believe "empty nest" can occur when our children are still at home...it's really the letting go, the pulling away that our children do when they get to a certain point in their young adult life. That 'pulling away', no longer so needing of their parents is what causes the empty nest feeling in our hearts. We've spent so many years with our whole world revolving around our children...running, going, and doing for them...but now they no longer need us. They are quite capable on their own. And that's what we want when we are raising and teaching them...we want them to grow up to be independent, self-reliant, respectful and respectable adults, and we're proud of them for it. However, it doesn't make the letting go, or the feeling of uselessness we get when they no longer need us go away any easier or faster. It's just the start of the next phase of each of our lives. I suppose it will get easier in time, just as all change does, but I'm thinking a hobby or something would do me really good right now. If I don't find things to do for and by myself, I'll try to put all of my attention to my 15 year old son...and that would positively smother him! Guess I better figure out something else to keep me occupied. I'll keep you posted!

A New Season and Unfinished Business

As I help my daughter prepare to begin her first year of college, I can't help but to think back on my unfinished dreams. Two things I've wanted to do my whole life (seriously, for as far back as I can remember!) is to complete a college education, and to write a book (preferably a best seller). To date I have completed neither. Why is it that some people get stuck in the thought that making themselves important enough to complete something they love or dream of is selfish? I always say, 'one day I WILL complete my college education', and 'one day I WILL write a book'. Most do believe I will complete my college and earn my bachelors degree, but those who are closest to me no longer believe I will write my book. However, I believe as I move into this new season of my life, with one child beginning college and one beginning high school, and the house still and quiet much of the time, I will allow the stories to unfold as I transcribe every word and thought. All that we are called to do does not need to be done before the age of 40! Nay, much of what we are led to do requires a certain amount of life experience. Lest we not forget that our age should not dictate our actions, but rather our actions dictate our age! Keep your dreams burning in the back of your mind. Don't let them go. When the timing is right, your spark will burn up to a full flame and you'll see it come to fruition.